Gay men’s articles of monogamy and non-monogamy: changes, ability and worries

Though some homosexual boys idealise monogamy, specifically in early phase of a relationship, lovers commonly come to be non-monogamous as time passes, Australian analysts state in a write-up published online before print in attitude, Health and Sexuality.

Men often watched non-monogamy as realistic in gay commitments, as a result of personal and national norms in homosexual networks. But changing the earth guidelines of connections might frustrating for several twosomes, particularly if the couples have various worth about monogamy and non-monogamy.

With this qualitative research, Steven Philpot and peers executed in-depth interviews with 61 Australian gay guy. The interviews discovered dilemmas of intimacy, interactions and monogamy with guy have been either single or even in lovers at the time of the interview.



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sexual desire

Another statement for sexual drive.


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Qualitative studies are utilized to browse and discover people’s viewpoints, feedback, thinking or habits. They requires questions regarding exactly how and exactly why. Qualitative reports might by asking questions about precisely why men and women battle to make use of HIV protection systems. It couldn’t ask exactly how many consumers make use of them or accumulate info like quantities. Qualitative investigation techniques include interview, focus teams and participant looking around you.

HIV is normally given within determined commitments, therefore an improved familiarity with union dynamics is really important for HIV reduction.


Many men, specially younger people, implicitly forecast monogamy is the foundation for long-lasting commitments. These people believed it developed security, safety, intimacy and faith. It absolutely was watched stage a more ethical quality of life than non-monogamy and promiscuity.

“We never reviewed are fully special: it absolutely was just certain that people would only find out one another.” (solitary, 21 many years).

“Even though I’m gay I however have confidence in your entire secure kids thing. Hence, I do need a husband and family.” (Coupled, 22 years).

However, males failed to always think that monogamy would last. It really is viewed as vital at the outset of a relationship:

“In my opinion it’s vital that you have monogamy for at least the first 3 years of the romance mainly because it produces mental contacts and a New Orleans sugar daddy spiritual relationship. And because in the 1st three years of your respective union, which is new and you dont like to rip that out and also have that strain put on the partnership.” (sole, 29 years).

Many men expected dating to change to non-monogamy over time. Although some people explained this by referring to the completely ready accessibility to gender regarding gay field, rest offered natural information:

“for those who’ve had gotten two hormonally pushed males they generally only need an outlet whenever they don’t want to self-destruct.” (individual, 24 years).

Equal person furthermore said that social connection with additional gay partners had directed him to anticipate a non-monogamous commitment, though they fought against this hope.

“Most members of affairs I know with lasted were open thus besides the fact that I don’t love it, i realize that in case i would like an enduring commitment, there’s a high probability that’s the answer to accomplishment.”

On the contrary, some other people aspired to non-monogamy. They could idealise more aged couples whose interaction were protected, profitable and available:

“They’re deeply in love and they’ve received a residence jointly. And they’re in a completely available partnership… That’s anything I would like too. It’d become great to arrive at that point quickly enough in which insecurities have gone and you simply dont be concerned with who’s sleep with which, when you really like an individual you’re went room to… If [partner] but accomplish be with each other long-lasting, that is where I find out our connection moving.” (combined, 28 decades).